Mesmerizing

She's got me. Completely.

Jon and I were talking the other day about how we love our children. I mentioned that you hear all the time that people worry about loving their second child as much as their first - but are relieved when their 'heart expands' to accomodate a new life.

Yes, but no.

I was ready for that heart-doubling feeling. And it is true that my heart was captured the moment I held Ever to my chest for the first time, seconds after she was born. To be fair though - it was captured before I ever laid eyes on her. A bond was forged during those months of carrying her wiggly little body in mine. Little by little as I got to know her, felt her gentle stretches, prayed for her, discerned her spirit, I developed a deep love for my daughter.

That love continues to expand rapidly. She has her father's crooked smile that melts my heart. She lights up the room when she's happy, which is often. She giggles when I tickle her and crinkles up her eyes when she sees me. All the little moments that make up our day together add to my love for her.

So it's not exactly like my heart doubled in size- there wasn't an instantaneous, sudden change. It's more like I've been given the chance to grow a new love - starting the moment I saw that extra line on the pregnancy test. Maybe even before.